Was It Love???

Last night I pondered on the fact of if I ever really loved you.

Sat and thought about the different events we went through and choices I made.

I came to the conclusion I never really put you first.

I guess its because your voice was not strong enough-

I put others hopes and dreams first. Thought about how certain things would affect friends and family members.

But I never thought about the long term effects on you

I forced myself to believe that this was true love and every action that took place was for the betterment.

I know that I was sadly mistaken.

There are so many scars left from the pain and I wish that they were all unreal.

I am screaming I never really put you first.

But I compose myself and know that after time has passed and tears have fallen I know how to love.

I am not an expert but I will never cause me pain again.

I understand the passage in Corithians

I will be patience with me

I will be kind to me

I wont envy, boast or be proud.

I wont be rude, self-seeking, angry, or keep records of my wrongs

I wont delight in evil but be excited with truth.

I protect, always trusts, always hope, always perseveres

Love wont fail and I love me.