My mother looked at me and said you know sometimes you need to have a "F--- You Too" moment. My mouth dropped. My mother doesn't talk like that.... well she tries to refrain from saying stuff like that. She is a deacon, a special ed teacher and a kind woman who wants to be a mother-in-law and have cute cuddly grandkids. But I digress....
When those words rolled off her tongue like water off a ducks back it was like an alarm went off in my head. Damn. Why did she wait 25 years to tell me this magical piece of information? I mean don't get it twisted I have done my own level of "revenge" to others but this moment that my mother spoke of was something that was totally different. It was that magical thing that Beyonce talks about in Irreplaceable. I guess a lot of it is because as she and many of my friends have so eloquently stated the past few weeks I have a "strong back(a good and bad thing)." I take on what many just won't put up with. For different reasons in different situations.
But as I opened my ears to my mother, I opened my heart. I allowed her to speak words that would heal years of ignorance and avoidance. To scared to deal with confrontation and feel like a failure, I have saddled bags to my back, convincing myself things would get better, crushed emotions and turned a blind eye to the obvious. Relationship after relationship... Damn girl this has to be better....
Stop taking the bullshit...Learn to see the signs and walk away..... The lesson so simple.
But as my mother spoke the words to soothe my soul and wisdom for the next steps in life the one thing that I am reminded of is how great it is to flip someone the bird!
Her words freed me. Reminded me that when I did take the time to flip the bird back I felt great, it allowed me to say nope this is my worth.
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